Making Plans

After a long day washing dishes at Denny’s I walked in the bar, sat down, ordered a beer lit a cigarette and thought about robbing a bank or more realistically, a liquor store. I needed money to give to my ex wife so she would let me see my ex kid. I could take him to a baseball game if I had some money. I raised my empty bottle and winked at the bartender. She brought me another. “Thanks,” I said, she smiled and I wished I were someone else. Somewhere else, anywhere, with some money, my son and a woman that at least pretended she loved me. “Fuck it,” I thought and put three dollars in the jukebox and played “Good Hearted Woman” as if there are any. As if I really wanted to be somewhere else with my son, I want another beer, easy enough; I thought, made it happen and sighed. It ain’t so bad and neither am I.
While I was walking home I decided to call my ex wife from a pay phone outside a Circle K. “Hey baby.”
“Don’t call me that.”
“I called hoping I could talk to Jason.”
“He’s not here.”
“When will he be.”
“None of your business.”
“Why are you so pissed at me?”
“That’s a stupid question.”
“Maybe, anyway, I’ll call later.”
“Please don’t.”
“Shit,” I said hung up walked into the store and bought a twelve pack. At least I have a job I thought and laughed.

I woke up at five, drank a beer, walked to the Denny’s and quit my job. My boss told me I’d end up back in jail. I said, “Yeah, I fucking hope so.”
“You’re a pussy.” My boss said as I walked outside. It was a nice day, too early to buy beer, I walked home and went to sleep. I dreamed I was playing in the NFL. I woke up, walked to the Circle K, bought a twelve pack and called my ex wife. “Hey baby.”
“Don’t call me that.”
“I’m going to rob a bank.”
“If you do, you owe me money.”
“That’s all you think I’m good for.”
She laughed.
“What’s so funny?”
“You are.”
“Can I come over?’
“No.”
“Why not.”
She laughed again, said “Goodbye,” and hung up.
At least she said goodbye; I thought while I walked home to think about the bank. It can’t be that hard. I thought about bank robber movies but that depressed me. I like movies where the bad guys get away with it and couldn’t think of any. I’d seen some but they were on the tip of my tongue. When I got out of jail my buddy Tom gave me a thirty-eight he had in his safe. “What do I need this for?” I asked.
“You never know.”
Tom was right.
I took the pistol with me to the bar. I had a lot to think about and I was driving myself nuts. I thought I could use some company. The bar was almost empty. I asked the bartender for a shot of whiskey and a beer. I drank them quick and ordered another. “I quit my job this morning.” I said.
“Cool,” she responded and handed me the shot and beer.
“I had to, do you like your job?”
“It’s alright.”
“Mine sucked.”
“Most of them do.”
“I’ll drink to that,” and I did. I tried to think of something else to say, couldn’t and she was gone. “I would take five years off the ass end of my life if I could fuck her tonight,” I said softly to myself.

Plans do not work, I thought. “Can I have another? Action,” I said.
The bartender set a full glass next to my hands. I smiled. No reaction.
“Are you driving?” The bartender asked.
I laughed. “I wish I was.”
"At least you're not" she said and strolled down the bar.
“I wish I was. What do you think about that?” I asked myself.

I didn't rob a bank. I am not that ambitious. I walked home put the gun under my bed and slept. I woke up the next morning and begged my job back. The moral of this very short story is they always need dishwashers at Denny's, I guess.